My Husband Cheated On Me

Coming to grips with my husband cheated on me is very hard and painful. The anger and resentment and unanswered questions are a lot to deal with, especially when you still love him. If you are still struggling with a husband who has cheated on you I hope this information is helpful for your relationship and marriage.

I find it strange at times to hear folks say if my husband or wife cheated on me I would do this or that. The reason why it is strange is because folks have no idea what it’s really like to be cheated on. If they did they wouldn’t even be joking about my husband or wife cheated on me.

Now that your husband has cheated on you do you have any thoughts yet on what you want to do? For a number of women they decide immediately that their marriage is over but I think this is to important to make a quick decision. In your case I hope you take the proper time to make the right decision. In the end you might decide to end your marriage but it should not be a choice you make based on the way you feel today.

My Husband Cheated On Me Tip #1

My first suggestion for dealing with your cheating husband is that make sure that you have a good support system to help you get through this difficult period. The burden that you are carrying shouldn’t be all on your shoulders. If you have a trustworthy family member or friend, why not confide in them and share what you are going through. It helps to just be able to have someone listen to you and give you objective advice. You don’t need someone to take your side or gang up on your cheating husband. You want someone who cares about you and your marriage. You need a stress relief outlet.

My Husband Cheated On Me Tip #2

Let your husband know where he stands. Your husband cheated on you and obviously he knows that he has screwed up. What he doesn’t know is if you are ending your marriage or perhaps willing to forgive him and try to work things out. My suggestion is that you be honest with him and tell him that you have no idea what the future holds for the two of you. Let your husband know that this is the most difficult thing you have had to deal with in your lifetime and the only thing that you can assure him is that you want to do what’s best for the both of you. What you don’t want to do is cut off all communications with him. If he means anything to you throw him a bone from time to time while you sort things out, especially if he is showing regret and remorse.

My Husband Cheated On Me Tip #3

I hope you don’t blame yourself for your husband cheating. It’s very easy to think that you could have been a better lover or supporter and it might have prevented your husband from cheating. The only one who truly could have prevented your husband from cheating is your husband. Regardless of what was going on in your marriage, cheating by your husband was not the solution to your problems. Your husband made a bad decision and now that he cheated, your marriage and life has been turned upside down. Although, part of the healing, recovery and renewing process is personal reflection, don’t take responsibility for his poor judgment.

My husband cheated on me” are words that no wife ever wants to utter. Although many wives think about it and fear it, when it actually happens it can be devastating. If you aren’t careful the emotional and mental strain can take a toll on you. Please make sure that you are working through the issues in a practical and beneficial way so that at the end of the process you are healed, and able to forgive your husband for cheating. Then at that point you will know for sure if you can continue to be married to your unfaithful husband.

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7 Responses to My Husband Cheated On Me

  1. my husband keeps lying to me he says his going to his mams then 2 and half hours later ill have his phone off all the time and he drink alot

    • admin says:

      I think your husband needs to understand how his behavior is not only hurting you but your relationship is crumbling and he has the power to stop it. Please read more of the postings on Help In Marriage to get some additional tips on dealing with your husband.

  2. hope you found out the truth and your right it does hurt when you love someone so much and they hurt you .

  3. jae says:

    i have been together with my husband for amlost 7 years and married for 4 1/2, we have 3 kids that are very young, my husband was acting different, distant then he asked for space. i gave him it hoping that it was just to get away from the fighting, he took off his ring which upset me and i didnt understand. the worst kept going through my mind but he just said he need space and talk to me when he was ready. the first few days were very hard but by the 6th day i was getting used to it. later that night he just kept staring at me like he wanted to say something but couldnt then i kept asking whats wrong, he said what do u think. just the way he looked and said that i knew, so i said u did something? my heart just broke, i was so confused and hurt, all i said was why, who is she, how could u do that. i asked all the questions there was but he couldnt explain. he said even though it dont matter he was sorry. i hurt and angry and told him to get out. he started to pack his stuff and i guess he wasnt able to find a place to stay so i
    he didnt go. i told him i blame myself also but what he did was worse and i dont know how he did it. even after what he just told me i still want to be with him, i dont know why, i feel so stupid. it has been almost three days since he told me and we both agreed that we should get a divorce sometime soon. he said that i will never be able to trust him again and i told him to stop any contact with this person and give me time. he still has been staying here and i dont know if i still want him or what. i know when we file i can make him suffer but i dont want that no matter how i feel right now. why do i still love him? he asked me that too and i said after all those years and three kids its hard to let go. is this wrong? we are still getting a divorce and still live together but sleep in seperate rooms, he said maybe one day we get passed this we could be together again because right now he dont feel that its right to be together after tha

    • admin says:

      First let me say that I’m very sorry that your husband has broken his vows and your trust. The confusion and mixed emotions that you are experiencing are quite normal. If you recently found out about his affair, it will take some time to work through this difficult period of your marriage. It sounds as though you and your husband are rushing things a little talking about divorce. I understand that you are angry and hurting but don’t make a final decision until you have gotten your emotions under control and can think clearly. Divorce is painful as well so unless there is a concern about safety (you and your kids) I would advise you to take it slow for now. I could be wrong but I think you still have a lot of questions that need to be answered. Figure out what it is you need and desire for you to be healed, emotionally and mentally. After you figure that out you will have a better chance of restoring your marriage. If your husband is in a rush to get a divorce it could be a sign that he is emotionally connected to the person he had the affair with or it could be that he is so ashamed of his actions that he no longer feels worthy of being a husband and father. He needs to do some soul searching as well.

      I hope and pray that you find some peace during this difficult time. Please know that many other couples have been in your position and have made it through.

  4. Shannon says:

    My husband had an affair. I just found out about it a few weeks ago. He said it was emotional an over the internet. Then the girlfriend called me and told me they were still talking and that it was more then emotional. My world stopped spinning. We have been married for 13 years together for almost 15. We have three kids. I love my husband with all my heart. I have not forgiven him yet, but we talk all the time and we want to “fix” the marriage. The thing is…Now that this has happened I feel closer to him then ever. We are closer then we have ever been. Is this normal?

    • admin says:

      First let me say that I’m saddened to hear that your husband has made the unfortunate mistake of letting someone else enter your intimate world and broken your sacred bond. However, I’m glad to see that you are dealing with situation admirably. You have a lot to think about and 15 years together and three precious children (gifts from God) is not to be taken lightly.

      I would say that you feeling closer to him immediately after finding out about the affair is not common. I don’t like to describe feelings as normal or abnormal because we are all wired a little different. I would like to caution you though that as time goes on and you begin to find out a little more about your husband’s indiscretion your feelings will most likely change.

      The two things that I would suggest (please note this is just a suggestion) is that you ask him to end his relationship with her i.e., CEASE ALL CONTACT and be honest with you when discussing the relationship he had with her.

      The only way you can begin to restore and rebuild your relationship is if you reseal the sacred bond to include just the two of you and have him earn your respect and trust back by being honest with you.

      My prayer is that the two of you can work things out and that your children get to see you grow old together.

      God Bless!

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