Marriage can be blissful, pitiful or somewhere in-between. All marriages need marriage assistance but the question is how much or what kind of marriage advice is right for your situation. If you have just a few minutes I would like to recommend some marriage assistance to perhaps help in making your marriage successful.
First, I would like to make sure that you aren’t beating yourself up because of the marriage problems you might be experiencing. I can assure you with 100% certainty that all couples go through up and down periods in their relationship. There is a need to not get stuck in the down periods or perhaps be a rut for too long. Unhappiness breeds discontent and before you know it, resentment creeps in and you find yourself looking for marriage assistance.
Let’s get started looking at some of the ways you can improve your marriage, starting today.
Marriage Assistance Tip #1 – Prioritize Your Needs
When dealing with marriage problems it’s very easy to want to solve all of the problems at once. I understand that the pain you are experiencing is real and needs to be dealt with. However, I have found it helpful in marriage to take a step back and figure out which problems you want to tackle first. Very often when a person tries to fix all of the relationship problems at once it becomes overwhelming. When this happens, frustration sets in and before you know it you start losing hope.
I suggest that you make a list of the issues in your marriage which are truly building a wall between you and the love of your life. Your list should be prioritized according to which ones you feel need resolving the most. I would say that if you feel in your heart that if a particular problem doesn’t get resolved you will get divorced, then it should be at the top of the list.
Marriage Assistance Tip #2 – Ask Your Spouse To Come Up With A List
For a successful marriage, it requires a willingness of both spouses to work together to meet each other’s needs. This might not be something you feel comfortable with or ready to do at this time but at some point you need to know what issues your spouse has with your relationship. I would recommend that you ask your partner what areas of your marriage he or she would like to see improvement in. It might help to explain why you want to know this information and with you intend to do with it.
A good way to have this conversation is to make sure your spouse doesn’t feel like a fight is on the horizon or like “here we go again”. What you shouldn’t be seeking is a confrontation but rather information to help you have a better marriage and be a better spouse.
What if your spouse refuses to come up with a list? Then you start working on your listed items and patiently wait for his or her list.
Marriage Assistance Tip #3 – Rearrange Your Life
Someone once said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. If you want your marriage to be renewed or transformed, you perhaps need to make some changes in your life.
Could you cut back on doing some of the things you love to do and dedicate that time to working on your marriage? If you were going to lose your home I know you would work hard to keep it. The same thing goes for your job. Why not put in the same effort for your marriage?
The key is to make sure that on a daily basis you are thinking about your marriage and how what you are doing is helping or hurting your marriage.
Will marriage assistance work if only you want to fix your marriage? I would be lying if I said yes because sometimes spouses have lost all hope and want out of the marriage. However, you will never regret doing your part to save your marriage.
There is quite a bit of marriage assistance or help in marriage available for you and your spouse. For some couples marriage counseling with a therapist or church pastor is a helpful option to get a better perspective on resolving marriage problems. However, not every couple has two willing participants for marriage counseling. If that’s your situation please continue to read through some of the many postings here on our Help In Marriage site.
I would also suggest you take a moment and see if the following resource might be helpful to you. It’s called “Save My Marriage Today”. It’s helped many couples move beyond there marriage problems with some detailed assistance and plans of action. It cost less than a family night at the movies but could very well save your marriage.