I know you think you will never get through the pain of infidelity. It’s hard to read a headline about cheating without being reminded of the pain you are living with. People say they feel your pain but how could they? Your thoughts are uncontrolled at this point and some days you don’t know what to do.
I don’t know you but I know of you. You are not as alone as you think. There are millions of us who know your thoughts and your pain. Can I tell you that although you feel as though your world is crashing you can survive the crash due to infidelity?
Have you ever passed by or seen on the news one of those car accidents where a car has been split in half or perhaps wrapped around a pole? Your heart breaks and your mind thinks, “there is no way anyone survived”. Yet folks sometimes walk away with scratches in those types of accidents.
So although infidelity isn’t a car accident it can turn your life into a wreck. The question is “what are you willing to do to put your life back together”?
Here are 3 things you can do to fix your crushed heart after an affair;
- Love Yourself
- Serve Others
- Move Forward
One of the keys to surviving infidelity is to focus on yourself and not your cheating partner. If you can take your eyes off your partner and worry about you for a short while it will help you keep your self respect and sanity during this period.
You must love you and take care of yourself before you can forgive and love your partner the right way again.
Your security and happiness cannot rest only with and in your partner. It’s critical that you get to the place in your recovery where you know without a shadow of a doubt that you can make it through this situation. Not that you and your cheating partner will reconcile your relationship but rather that regardless of the outcome you will love yourself. You should not feel unwanted or rejected but you should know that you are valuable and have a lot to offer this world.
There is very little in life that can bring you joy and peace that serving others can bring. If you take time out of your busy schedule and share your time, talents and treasures with others you would be amazed how helpful this can be. All of a sudden your bitterness gets replaced with thankfulness. Helping others brings a great sense of fulfillment and eases your emotional pain.
Moving forward is one of the more difficult goals to achieve when dealing with a crushed heart. However, it’s a necessity. You have to look to the future and figure out how to get there.
My hope is that you move forward with your cheating partner. But if he/she is not smart enough to realize how valuable you are then you must move forward alone.
Living off your good memories of the past is not enough. Just like staying stuck in middle and holding onto anger, bitterness and resentment is not helpful. It’s also unhealthy to do so.
You must move forward and begin to live joyfully and no longer be captive to the pain and suffering associated with the affair.
Loving yourself, serving others and moving forward will help you put back together your life and your broken heart. As I mentioned above, you are not alone. There are millions of people rooting for your relationship to succeed.