You and your spouse probably have different beliefs about the need to improve your marriage so it’s usually a challenge to do so. In many marriages both spouses agree that something is wrong or missing and feel the need to improve the marriage. However, the difficulty is agreeing on the real issues and the severity of them.
It’s natural to disagree on marital issues or in any relationship for that matter. The problem becomes when you let your differences come between you and you end up miserable and frustrated. No one said that marriage would be one continuous honeymoon but it also isn’t suppose to be like being in a prison, trapped and fighting for your survival.
Why is it so important to improve your marriage? Well, generally speaking couples who are able to improve certain areas in the relationship develop a strong bond that can hold together during seasons when things aren’t going that well in the marriage. All marriages have their ups and downs and during the down periods couples who have worked together tend to have an easier time getting through the common marriage problems.
I’m sure you have read that you shouldn’t try to change your spouse in hopes of improving your marriage. This may lead you to conclude that your marriage will always be in turmoil if your spouse doesn’t change. In fact why try to improve your marriage if your spouse is stubborn and unwilling to change?
Well every one of us can change and both the husband and wife have a responsibility to understand areas of the marriage to improve and find ways to do so. Unfortunately, a lot of times people aren’t aware of the changes that need to be made and thus they never get done.
There are some common problems that couples struggle with which can ruin your marriage if you are not careful. I have highlighted them below;
- Be consistently angry, selfish, rude and abusive.
- Refuse to forgive your spouse for any offense.
- Stop communicating openly and honestly.
- Stay depressed and negative as much as possible.
- Convince your spouse that your children are more important than he or she is.
- Be consistently lazy and refuse to do much around the house.
- Spend money foolishly and continually run up great debt.
- Give place to addictions or annoying habits and defend your right to have them.
- Don’t care about what your spouse needs sexually as long as you get what you want.
- Habitually look at explicit films, magazines, or advertising and compare your husband or wife to the glorified images you see there, and especially mention others whom you find more attractive.
- Allow your heart to grow hard toward your spouse and refuse to ever say “I’m sorry,” “Forgive me,” or “I forgive you.”
- Make something other than God and your spouse your top priority.
- Threaten to get a divorce every time something comes up between you and your spouse that needs to be worked out.
- Have an affair or entertain an obsession of the heart over someone other than your spouse.
- Move out of the home and don’t try to reconcile your differences.
- Give up and refuse to believe that God is a God of miracles who can restore love and hope in your marriage.
There are so many areas that both husbands and wives can work on to improve your marriage. A good place to start is to look over the above list and start making changes to ensure that these common problems don’t become a thorn in your marriage.
So what’s holding you back from improving your marriage? Do you have the desire but your spouse is not on the same page? Could it be that you want to but just don’t know where to start?
Well you must start somewhere and sometime to improve your marriage so why not get started today?
I don’t know what problems you are facing but please take a look at the resources below as I believe the help in marriage you have been searching for can be found here. Just click on one of the resources to see more information.