9 Tips For Improving Your Marriage Starting Today

Are you missing something in your marriage like friendship, intimacy or trust? For some couples it’s no longer a question of if they will get divorced but when. For other couples the marriage is neither good nor bad but rather indifferent. For the last group of individuals the marriage is over. Where does your marriage fall and could you use 9 tips for improving your marriage?

Listed below are the 9 tips you should consider to try to help your marriage improve:

1) Stop criticizing things your spouse says and does
2) Respect your spouse in public and in private
3) Don’t expect your spouse to fill your every need
4) Keep the past in the past and try to live today and for the future
5) Seek forgiveness from your spouse for things you have done wrong
6) Forgive your spouse for his or her wrong doings
7) Do something good (words or deeds) for your spouse at least once per day
8) Be attentive when interacting with your spouse (turn away from the phones, computers, tablets and other gadgets) and show a genuine interest toward your spouse
9) Listen

You may have noticed that not one of the tips noted have anything to do with your spouse making any changes. I offered no suggestions on how to get your spouse to do things your way. There are no insights on how to make your spouse stop doing things that annoy you. I rarely offer such advice because it’s generally a waste of time. Your spouse will change once you change the atmosphere of your marriage.

If you really want to improve your marriage, I believe you need to focus on the things that you can control. You can choose to continue to go to war each day with your spouse or you can change your strategy and offer kindness instead of bitterness. You can choose to be peaceful or angry over every little thing.

Improving your marriage is very possible. You might feel like giving up but please don’t. Your marriage is worth fighting for and you must give it your all. I know it’s hard but hang in there. You are climbing up the rough side of the mountain. It gets easier when you focus on the most important things in your marriage. For more information, please see here; Click Here!

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Marriage Help For Husbands

Finding marriage help for husbands is easy to find but often times difficult to get the husband to entertain the thought of getting help. If we are being honest I think most folks will agree that men just don’t do well with accepting help. You can’t make suggestions to a husband about how to get from point A to point B when you are traveling. You definitely can’t make any comments about your husband needing advice on how to be a better husband. Well, you can but unless your husband has been transformed, he won’t digest it very well.

So what kind of help is available for husbands?

For starters, I think a lot of men learn by observing others. If you are “The Husband” reading this article then I applaud you for taking steps to improve yourself and your marriage. I recommend finding some movies where couples act out real life issues in the movie so you can see how obstacles can be overcome in a marriage. I know it’s only a movie but I assure you that it’s based on some ones real life experience. A movie that comes to mind is Fireproof. Check it out and view the movie as a couple or if your wife won’t view it with you, check it out on your own.

There are also some men who learn from reading. I have nothing against reading books but I prefer listening to the book or download some podcasts about relationships. There are 1,000s of audio books/podcasts available for minimal costs on the internet. Seek and you shall find.

Another great way to improve your relationship with your wife is to be observant of your wife. Your wife is the best teacher you will ever have when it comes to improving your marriage. Pay close attention to her words, facial expressions and body movements. You will quickly learn what she wants and needs and equally important what she doesn’t like.

For marriage help for husbands to be successful, it must be received and applied as necessary. If pride and ego get in the way, help of any kind offered to husbands will be rejected. If you want to help your marriage succeed, help yourself to knowledge and insights that will help you grow.

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Married To A Stranger?

Remember when there was no caller ID and the phone would ring? Your heart would beat faster and faster as you anticipated getting that call from the love of your life. This was before cell phones were a necessity and home phones had caller ID. Now when you see the text message or phone number pop-up your stomach gets gassy instead of butterflies. Who is this person you are sharing the rest of your life with?

Do you ever feel like you are married to a stranger? You no longer like the same shows, you don’t want to hang out together and intimacy is rare and awkward?

If you feel this way your spouse probably feels the same way. You are now at a crossroad in your marriage. Which direction will you go?

Will you stay on the same path and continue to grow apart? It’s very easy to do so. Many couples stay married for many years after they have emotionally and physically checked out of the marriage. For convenience they stay with their spouse, who is now like a stranger. Unfortunately, this results in a very frustrating marriage.

Will you take steps now to work out your differences and get your marriage back on track? Sometimes all it takes is a refocusing on each other and before you know it your spouse is not that strange anymore. Give it a try and see if making your spouse and your marriage a priority makes things better in your relationship.

Will you give up now and throw in the towel? I hate this option so let’s not spend a lot of time on it.

I think it’s a lot easier to invest the time and effort it takes to correct a marriage that is out of balance then to throw it away and start over. The person you fell in love with and the person your spouse fell in love with is still there. It just takes a little time to chip away the complacency that has built up over the last few years.

Your brain needs to be reminded of how good things can be. You need to get back to the point where you can tolerate each other. Once you can tolerate each other you need to get to the point where you enjoy being together. After you enjoy being together you will get back to the point where you can’t wait to see the next message or get the next phone call.

It’s time to get rid of your stranger and get the love of your life back.

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Husband Cheating On You?

Your husband cheating on you might be a sign of more than just his selfish desire to try something different. If you are dealing with an unfaithful husband then you most likely are in a battle for your life. If your husband is cheating, you have some serious decisions you may have to make in the weeks and months ahead.

What your husband cheating on you doesn’t mean;

  • He no longer loves you
  • He is in love with someone else
  • You are no longer able to satisfy his needs
  • Your cheating husband wants a divorce
  • He will leave you for the person he is cheating with
  • You will never be able to love him the same way
  • He can never be trusted again

What your husband cheating on you does mean;

  • There is a problem in your relationship that must be resolved
  • It will take time to understand why he cheated
  • You will need to be prepared for a bumpy journey on your road to recovering from your husband’s cheating
  • The more you understand your husband’s unfaithfulness the more pain you might feel
  • Truly trusting him again will be something you decide to do and not a feeling you experience
  • You may need some help in dealing with your husband’s unfaithfulness

Your husband cheating on you doesn’t mean the end of your marriage. Once you find out about a spouse’s affair is the beginning of the healing process. Although it’s very painful to find out about a cheating husband’s affair, it’s better to know than to be in a relationship where your spouse is cheating and you don’t know about it.

One thing I can assure you of is that you are more able to deal with his affair than you know. You can make it through this painful experience if you take your time (not too much time) to figure out what to do and when to do it. Don’t make rash decisions that you will regret later.

I’m sorry that you have to deal with your husband cheating on you. However, you can get through this rough period in your life. For more help on recovering from your husband’s cheating, please see below;

Help With Husband Cheating On You!

adulterous husband

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Cheating Husband Denies Affair

Is your cheating husband denying his affair adding insult to injury? Do you really want him to admit that he is cheating or are you still holding out hope that it’s not true? Perhaps you just need to know one way or the other. I know not knowing for sure can drive you crazy.

If your husband is cheating on you then I think you need to find out for sure. I’m not a big fan of waiting to see what happens. Of course, unless he is ready to walk away from your marriage, he won’t admit to being unfaithful. So what do you do now?

You have a few options you can exercise in moving forward and dealing with your potentially cheating husband.

Find Out For Sure

  • I would suggest you use all available resources to find out if he is cheating. Use the phone records, credit card bills, bank statements etc., to catch him red handed.
  • Check his car, show up at his job unannounced and chat with some of his friends to get a clue about his possible cheating.
  • If your husband is cheating and denying it, he will make a mistake. He can hide a one night stand but he can’t hide a meaningful relationship.

Don’t Give Him An Excuse

  • If your husband is cheating he will look for reasons to be absent. He will start arguments and disappear when the opportunity presents itself.
  • Don’t let him use an excuse that you aren’t spending intimate time with him in the bedroom. I know it might be hard to sleep with him when he might be cheating and denying it to your face. Try to work through it.
  • Try not to push him out the door. As difficult as it might be, I would recommend that you try to manage your emotions during this trying time. If you are angry, bitter all the time he will use that as an excuse for spending time away from home.

Put Some Boundaries In Place

  • If you don’t have any boundaries, please consider trying to put some in.
  • He shouldn’t be allowed to come and go when and where he pleases. He should be communicating with you, even if you are not getting along that great.

The fact that your cheating husband denies the affair is a sign that at least you are dealing with the issue. Ignoring it would be the worst thing that you could do.

Trying to catch your spouse cheating really is less about spying then it is about paying attention to how they are acting, where they are going and who they are communicating with. If you really are determined to catch a cheating husband, you can and you will.

A good way to deal with a marriage in distress is to remove the stress. A healthy marriage can help you avoid infidelity and if you are recovering from an affair, survive it.

If you need help building a better marriage, please read more here; Restoring Relationships.

Obviously dealing with infidelity in marriage will be one of the most difficult obstacles you will ever face. Please don’t think you have to walk this road alone. If you can use some advice on how to survive and affair, please see here; Cheating Husband

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Will My Husband Cheat Again?

I hope you are doing ok, even as you struggle with the constant thought of “Will my husband cheat again”? I know it’s on your mind day and night and unfortunately until you trust him again it will continue to eat at your heart. Your husband needs to give you a reason to believe that he will be faithful from now on. Your marriage will suffer if your cheating husband doesn’t work towards earning your trust and respect back.

Recovering from infidelity is very much possible. Despite what your heart feels at this time and what your mind is telling you, it is possible to be a loving couple again. Does that mean that he won’t cheat again? I wish the answer was no but I would be wrong to make you a promise that your husband may not keep. However, you can only do your best to help keep an open, honest and healthy marriage. You can’t do any more or any less.

Will My Husband Cheat Again?

In my humble opinion, your husband will cheat again if he doesn’t believe that what he did was wrong. As strange as it sounds, some cheating husbands feel justified when they cheat. If he felt neglected then in his mind he may be thinking that he deserves the attention that received from his mistress. I’m not saying that your husband had any right to cheat. I’m just saying that he may have reached the conclusion that it was ok to cheat.

Your husband may cheat again if he believes that there will be no consequences for his infidelity. If you simply forgive him for cheating but don’t require any behavioral changes on his part he might think that if he gets caught cheating again, you will forgive him again.

Your husband might cheat again if he feels emotionally attached to the person he cheated with. Lust is a powerful temptation and if your husband is emotionally and physically attracted to the other woman then he just might give in again to his feelings.

How Can I Stop My Husband From Cheating?

  • Make your relationship more appealing than his interest in others
  • Create some boundaries in your relationship to help him remain faithful
  • Find out why he cheated and try to put in place some tools in your marriage to prevent him from the temptation of cheating again
  • Hold him accountable for his actions and get to the point where he knows that you will be checking behind him to ensure that you don’t get hurt again

I know trying to answer the question about will my husband cheat again is a difficult one to answer. It’s dealing with the present pain and the potential future pain of him cheating again. No one deserves to have to deal with a cheating husband, especially one who cheats over and over again.

Obviously dealing with infidelity in marriage will be one of the most difficult obstacles you will ever face. Please don’t think you have to walk this road alone. If you can use some advice on how to survive and affair, please see here; Infidelity In Marriage

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3 Reasons Why Your Husband Is Avoiding You

I know it’s driving you crazy that you can’t figure out why your husband is avoiding you. Doesn’t it feel like you have some kind of contagious disease? He delays responding to text messages or doesn’t pick up your calls. He conveniently has to work and spends more time out of the house than he does in it. When he is home he really is only there physically and not emotionally. It’s eating at you I bet. What is he up to?

Here are a few reasons your husband might be avoiding you;

Your Husband Is Being Unfaithful

I understand this is no great revelation to you because it’s most likely what you suspect is going on. Maybe he is or maybe he isn’t cheating. If he is you need to find out for sure. If your husband isn’t cheating you need to get to the point where you are convinced that he isn’t. You will not have the best relationship possible if you don’t trust your husband.

If your husband is cheating, there is no reason why you should be able to catch him. It’s very difficult to cheat and get away with it if it’s more than a one night stand. Now of course you can ignore the signs but then you will always be wondering and never be trusting.

Tips to catch a cheat;

  • Check his phone log
  • Review his credit card and checking account for unusual charges, especially right after Valentines Day and Christmas
  • Look in his car (especially the glove department and the trunk). These are good places to toss receipts
  • Show up at his job for a surprise lunch date
  • If he often has to make runs to store and it takes longer than you think it should, offer to go with him. If he changes his mind about going, look out.

If you do a thorough investigation and you don’t turn up anything, perhaps your husband isn’t being unfaithful.

You Husband Is Avoiding Confrontations With You

Could it be that very often when the two of you get together you have conflict? Fighting with your spouse can be very tiring and draining. One way to avoid the conflict is to avoid the person.

You might not even realize that you and your husband are having conflicts. It doesn’t have to be a knock down, drag out fight to be a conflict. Conflict can be just taking the opposite side of every issue. If you, your husband or both of you have to always be right and always have the last word, it’s conflict.

Try to be mindful of your interactions with your husband and see if you are at peace or at odds around each other.

Your Husband Might Be Hiding Something

Sometimes husbands are guilty of doing something that goes against their spouses wishes and guilt has them walking on eggshells. It could be knowledge that they have that they don’t want to share. It could be related to health, finances or family. For whatever reason your husband might think that avoiding you will limit the likelihood of having to reveal or discuss the issue with you. In his mind, he might believe that he is protecting you by keeping you out of the loop.

I have spent quite a bit of time trying to figure out why very happy and thriving marriages fall apart so easily. I’m convinced that for the most part all of us want what we want and if we don’t get it we can be difficult to deal with, let alone live with. Although we become adults, we still act like little children at times.

Do you or your husband ever pout, shout or ignore the other person when things don’t go your way? Be honest now. You have on occasion, right?

Well, if you and your husband aren’t growing closer together as time passes by then you are growing apart. You need to fix this now and get your husband to stop avoiding you. If he is cheating, find out and work things out. If you have too much conflict, stop sweating the small stuff and love more than you fight. If your husband is hiding something, show him how much you love him and get him to trust you enough to share with you.

Get your husband to stop avoiding you by getting him to fall madly in-love with you again. You did it before and you can do it again.

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Marriage Hope For Those Who Feel Helpless

Feeling trapped in a frustrated and hopeless marriage is painful. Unfortunately, dealing with marriage problems can lead to problems in all aspects of one’s life. It can not only ruin your marriage but seriously impact your health, relationships and career. Is there hope for your marriage?

Do you find it hard to believe that your marriage will get better when dealing with marital issues? Isn’t it strange that before you got married you believed that nothing could keep you apart? Now after a few years of marriage, it’s hard to imagine staying together. What happened?

I would guess that you, your spouse or the both of you have changed and your relationship has gotten out of sync. You now need to figure out how to realign your relationship. You need to reestablish your relationship and get it going down the right path again.

The good news is that you know exactly what to do. You were one of the key players in making your relationship work before. Who knows better than anyone else what makes you happy but what also makes your spouse happy?

So what’s the problem and why is your marriage still broken? Here are two possible reasons;

One reason your marriage is still broken is that you are so overwhelmed with the problems you can’t see the solutions. It’s sort of like your 15 year old car that breaks down on the highway. You see smoke pouring out of the engine and you assume it’s overheating. You pop the hood open and initially all you see is a cloud of smoke. You wonder is it the oil, water, radiator or engine. The car is 15 years old and has had so many problems you can’t figure out where to start looking.

Unfortunately that’s the problem some couples have with fixing their marriage. They don’t know where to start. As a result, they feel trapped and hopeless.

Another reason why your marriage might still be broken is you have given up trying to fix it. It’s very possible that your words and actions aren’t in sync. Very often spouses say that they want to rebuild their marriage but they continue to tear it down with their actions and deeds. You can say on the one hand that you still love your spouse but withhold expressing your love because you are angry and bitter. It’s hard for love to shine through when your heart is bitter. You know you are not trying your best when you are odds with your spouse all the time.

I know in your heart you are willing to fix your marriage. I commend you for that. Now it’s time to get your actions and your heart on the same page.

There is still hope for your marriage. I need you to believe that there is hope. If you don’t believe me let me share with you one example. I know a couple who experienced a horrible marriage. The husband cheated and the family fell on hard times due to his gambling and a drug habit. He would go missing for days and his wife and kids were left alone wondering if he would ever return alive. Needless to say their marriage was hanging on by a thin string. Well, the good news is that they made it through the difficult and dark period in their marriage. They have a strong healthy marriage today.

The couple endured quite a bit and it wasn’t easy but with forgiveness and rebuilding of trust and relationship their marriage turned around. They didn’t give up. They persevered.

If you don’t give up and you begin to step in the right direction, your marriage can be restored. Will it be easy? I doubt it. However, if you start to do the little things to make your marriage better, you have no idea how things will turn out.

I would suggest that you don’t wait for your spouse to change before you start saving your marriage. Even if your spouse believes that your marriage situation is hopeless, don’t settle for that. You do the right things and when it’s all said and done, your spouse might just be following you down the path of fixing your marriage.

Please continue to fight for your marriage. You are a winner and you can be victorious.

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Signs Your Husband Is Cheating On You

There are obvious signs your husband is cheating on you and not so obvious ones that you have to be looking for if you want to catch him. Notice the words “if you want to catch him”. Sometimes women don’t really want to catch their cheating husbands. They would prefer that the cheating stop and life gets back to normal. Unfortunately wishing or hoping that your spouse isn’t cheating is not a prudent way to protect your marriage.

5 Signs Your Husband might be committing adultery;

1. He isn’t home when he should be and when he’s out he is unreachable.
2. Your husband becomes very reluctant to let you see his phone or pick up his phone calls.
3. He doesn’t return your phone calls but takes calls from others.
4. Your love life is no life at all and you wonder why he isn’t intimate anymore.
5. Your husband starts to dress-up and wear cologne.

Looking for signs that your husband might be cheating is extremely difficult. One reason for this is a fear of finding out the truth. Women know that if their findings are true, a lot of pain awaits. Is it better to know that your husband is cheating?

Let’s suppose that you do find out that your husband is a cheat. Will you leave him or give him a chance to redeem himself? Will you ask him to move out or will you?

As you can see there are many decisions that have to be made. You will need strength and patience while you investigate your husband’s cheating.

Do you need help sorting out your husband’s infidelity? There are many things you can do to keep your sanity and marriage in check. For more info on “Signs your husband is cheating on you”, see here Infidelity Help

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Marriage Problems – Closing Your Eyes Won’t Solve The Issues

It’s perfectly normal to think if you ignore your marriage problems things will work themselves out. Unfortunately you and I know that problems rarely get fixed by themselves. Sure you can experience some short term relief from your marriage problems but most likely unresolved issues will continue to hurt you and your marriage.

Most people don’t like pain or shall I say that normal people don’t like pain. I can tell you I go out of my way to avoid pain. With marriage relationships it can be years of pain, frustration, bitterness and resentment that’s built up over the years. You just can’t pretend those painful years didn’t exist. If you are dealing with marriage problems keep your eyes wide open and deal with the issues one at a time.

Have you been able to talk with your spouse recently about your marriage obstacles? I hope that you still have some civility in your relationship so you can try to work things out. I realize that it’s painful but consider this;

If you do nothing about your marriage problems then you will most likely continue to be stressed out. I guarantee that once your marriage issues start to consume you, you will want to relieve the stress. I have been in your shoes and I know how it feels. On the one hand you know there are issues in your marriage. However, it’s a daunting task taking them on without feeling overwhelmed.

If you are at the breaking point in your marriage, hang on and never let go. There are solutions to your marital problems.

  • Do your best to be your best
  • Keep your spouse informed about your concerns
  • Discuss the details of the problems you have been experiencing
  • Remove highly destructive things from your marriage.

The sooner you deal with your marital problems the more balanced your life will be. If you need some help finding different things to try in-order to fix your marriage problems, please read on here…….Help In Marriage

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